If you have not noticed...

.... I am really bored this weekend. The apartment is totally abandoned - Pat went home to visit his family in Long Island, Geoff and Laura are out doing "roommate" things. I live on the East Side and was thinking about going to go visit Samantha on the West Side - but I do not think I have enough gas in my car to get to get over there.... This is the first time I have been in the apartment alone. Definitely decided I do not like it.... I shall escape by catching you up on FL stuff.... lets reminisce.....

So while in Orlando - Matt and I were invited to this girly-sleepover thing. I was super excited about it because Engle, the girl who was hanging upside down from the ceiling somewhere in this blog, was visiting from LA (and I love her).... But after a lot drama on her side of life - being left at the airport and being stranded, Engle could not make the sleepover... *sad face for me* - In her honor, the rest of us had a drunk-pillow fight! (which can be seen above.... they all ganged up on me)

After Orlando, we headed to New Smyrna for a few days! It was good to see my grandparents. Like most snowbirds, they travel down to FL in the cold weather months and stay in a cute little condo on the beach-front. My mom was down there visiting that weekend.... I love my mom. She is sunlight - warm, happy, all the good things that a person should be.

It was there, in New Smyrna.... while nibbling on yummy oysters, that we watched the shuttle launch March 15th. Never seen a sight quite like it.... we were less than forty-five miles from the launch-site at Cape Canaveral. The horizon lit up like it was on fire, the ground shook, the shuttle lifted off off the ground.... it left this wonderful colorful trail of smoke behind... just hanging in the atmosphere... While I was in Miami. I saw all the astronauts on TV - they were talking to Obama about the launch. Surreal to think that I saw them leave the earth...

It was also in New Smyrna that I finally visited the hospital - And the doctor informed me, "You have a heart murmur" (which I do not) - He also informed me "You are lactose intolerant" (which I am not).... cost me two hours, one hundred and sixty dollars, and a hell of a lot of anger to hear that come out of his mouth.... I do not get angry very often, but I almost punched the poor bastard in the face. What do you expect? Here I am, sitting in front of him, I have lost fifteen pounds from not being able to eat any real food for the past six weeks - and he is telling me that I have a leaky heart and I cannot drink milk.... fuck you! I have not drank milk since I was ten... I have been living on a diet of bananas and crackers for a month! Bastard!

After working with Santa Clause in Miami - Matthew told me the money that I had made was 'dirty money'. He did not want me to spend it on anything but bills.... And yes, while I did use the majority of the money to get us to Tampa - I did toss a few twenties towards an airboat ride through the Everglades! If I have learned anything from this job..... it is that negative experiences must be balanced out with positive experiences or you will lose your mind. And lets just cut to the chase here... I mean, how often do you get to ride in an airboat across the Everglades!? Yea - pretty much never.... It was great! I felt like James Bond - surrounded by Gators instead of hot chics!

What else....? Hung out with Dr E in Sarasota. - It was wonderful!.... Matt and E really hit it off. They chatted until 2am about Meditation and Zen-stuff.... This made me incredibly happy - because it finally gave me a chance to sneak away and grab some sleep without Matthew snoring in my face..... Man-oh-man... I do not care if I came across as antisocial...... sleep was never as glorious and as joyous as it was that evening!

FL was Great - but now I am broke-ass-broke...

Before Matt and I left Fiesta, our neighbor (Mike with the Bike) - took the two of us out for breakfast at this tasty breakfast place called the Wooden Spoon. Here is a guy who just lost his job - living off his motorcycle... and he offered to take two strangers out for breakfast..... amazing. Mike if you are now reading this, thank you sooo much for food - it was really unexpected and wonderful... : ) A nice escape from evil saltine crackers....

The Keys were wonderful, but Miami can suck a dick.... I am so BROKE!... That city hates me! I never make any money down there!... Rent is due this week - There is no money to buy groceries - And the worst all, Pat's birthday is this week - I cannot even buy him a birthday drink - I am the lamest girlfriend ever....


*shakes a fist at Miami for having such a crappy photography scene!*

While in Miami - I shot with this pervy guy who wanted me to sit on his lap and take photos.... (just like Santa Clause!) His friend showed up half way through the shoot with a video camera, did not even ask me if he could film... just started filming and shouting encouraging lines, "Straddle him like a stripper!" (I need to mention here... that No, I did not straddle him like a stripper). He was sweating on me and stroking my legs.... Under any normal circumstance - I would have picked up my things and immediately left the shoot - but Matt and I REALLY needed money to get to Tampa (and if you are not getting this, I mean - needed -We did not even have enough cash for gas, first time ever, I had maxed out my credit card, our flights were the next morning) Booked for a three hour shoot, I lasted almost two hours posing with this sweaty sit-on-my-lap guy - Matt took the photos. God, Matt was SO angry at me for not walking out.... I know that sometimes this job seems glamorous...... but seriously - sometimes it sucks so much.... I just want to curl up and go back to bed. - Arg! I should not have to deal with photographers like that anymore....

More than that - I should not have to deal with men like that... assholes assholes assholes! Everytime something like that happens, I lose more and more faith in the male-race.....

But yea - Back in CLE.... it is sunny outside. I am sitting in the sun, 30 degree weather, on my doorstep - watching all the cars drive by... I cannot really feel my fingers but luckily, I am so well versed in typing, I do not need to feel them to know they are hitting the correct keys..... Been practicing my banjo - Booked an emergency trip to Chicago on Tuesday - hope to make rent... Cinema Wasteland is this weekend.... lots of free partying over in Strongsville, Ohio.... Maybe I will have an Ebay sale this week. 

Oh desperation. I will NOT get another card, dammit. One card, I say! One card to rule them all!

Sunsets!

Fiesta Keys... (continued)

Matt and I bought most of our camping gear at Habitat for Humanity in New Smyrna. Our twenty-four dollar tent, though, we grabbed from K-Mart before we hit the Keys. Been incredibly stormy here at night - rain pounds down so hard, it feels as if we showed up just in time to experience the monsoon season.... Every night, we wake up to rain trying to flatten us to the ground - every night, our tent prevails!

This campground draws the best stories! I long for a tape recorder.... I want nothing more than to ask everyone who they are, what they do, where they hope to go....

Last night, Mike introduced me to this fantastic couple - Jimmie and Laura who spend nine months out of the year traveling around in their sailboat. When they are not sailing - they are at their homestead in Alaska.... this is their site. Other than the fact that they have the most amazing stories about grizzly bears and building cabins in the woods - I just thought it was really incredible that they were part of the 'art team' for Sean Penn's Into the Wild - They were in charge of all the botanical stuff. Jimmie and Laura gathered all the moss for the old bus. They planted flowers and made sure everything was native and Alaska-fied for the set.

Neat fact. If you read the book or watched the movie, you will remember the part where Chris shoots a moose (it is a big dramatic moment in both the novel and the film).... Anyways, I guess they had a trained male-moose for the first scene (obviously, they did not shoot their trained moose). For the second scene, they had this roadkill frozen dead moose flown in which turned out to be a female moose - Being female, she did not have any antlers..... Did you know they have an art team on set to make silly things like fake antlers for dead roadkill?.... They used deadbolts to screw the antlers on female moose's head.... ha.

Donated all our tenting stuff to our neighbor who is running from the police. His wife just dropped him off at the campground until they could come up with some kind of cash to get him out of trouble..... Super nice guy. He has been sleeping on a swimming pool blow-up toy without any blankets for the past few days.... He was SO excited about our blow-up Mattress. Happy we could give it to someone who could use it....

Now Matt and I are in Miami. Staying at a really nice hotel that I found for $25 on priceline. Even has free breakfast in the morning! We have been storing up on breakfast food - mostly bananas and bagels. Still have no money, so .... bagels for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Fiesta Keys... our home for the week....

Matt and I found the best place to camp! A nice quiet little key north of Marathon.... the entire key is a campground! Just a happy floating piece of land - covered with happy camping people. Right now, Matt and I are doing the primitive camping thing, which means no electric or water hookup - but it is cheap and all our neighbors are the best... The guy to our left (Mike with the Bike) - Lost his job in Detroit.... took his sign off bonus to travel around the US on his motorcycle.... you should see all the stuff he manages to pack on that bike - a tent, a stove, his clothes, his life, his guitar, he is even looking into getting a bike rack put on the back of the motorcycle - amazing stuff.... Our other neighbor is a crazy fisherman who swims around the reefs and stabs fish with a spear! To our luck, he also loves to cook for strangers - Last night our new guitar playing friend, a cute traveling couple, some random guy from across the way, Matthew and I - we all drank wine and ate Trigger Fish, Snapper, Lobster, Smoked Trout.... and talked about the Keys.... a nice break from all the crackers and bagels we have been eating....

Matthew is officially sick of the beach. I know it is horrible, but I keep dragging him to a new beach every morning.... without cash, the only thing that is free out here is the ocean and the sand (and even then, some of the ocean and sand costs money to hang out on). He says that I am trying to 'bake him alive'.... Truthfully, I am.... I am baking him alive for all the times he called me an 'evil bitch' and he meant it... I shall burn you with the sun, Matthew!! Take that... and that....

Yesterday we were at Sombrero Beach and we got to swim with dolphins.... it was amazing.... there was a pod of maybe four dolphins, only 15 feet from us... so so pretty...

Matt has fallen in love with Dan, the twenty-three year old guy who runs the front desk here.... It is endearing - because Dan is incredibly straight and completely oblivious to the fact that Matt keeps hitting on hit..... Last night, Dan invited Matt and I over last night for a campfire and some drinks. Dan's story is really nice to listen to - he lived in Ohio his whole life, got sick of it, took his last paycheck, drove to the Keys in his pickup truck, got a job at the campground. He lives on this island for seventy-five dollars a month, works seven days a week, sleeps in his truck. He can climb palm trees, hatchet coconuts, kayak the open ocean, and sleep until 4pm.... Dan, kinda-sorta, has the life here.... I am sorta-kinda-completely jealous on all accounts...

I will mention.... that Dan mentioned.... that half the people who work on this island - came from Ohio. It made me giggle a bit...

Dan has a blog. I have not read it yet, but it is here: Dan-the-Campground-Man

This campground is thee-shit.... two hot tubs all night, a full bar till 2am, happy hour until 7pm (drinks are $1.50!), just enough people in the camp - that it is neither claustrophobic nor dead at night.

Gotta get going.... Matt and I have quite the day today! In case you have not guessed it yet.... the two of us are going..... to.....The beach! Coco Plum Beach! Really sad that we have to leave for Miami tomorrow.... Going to miss it here... For the first time in my life, I can truthfully say, "I am enjoying FL." Never thought that I would ever say something so ludicrous....

Tampa! 80 degrees and Sunny!

Running on about five hours of sleep - but I will sing it just like Nina Simone would sing it, "Birds flying high, you know how I feel. Sun in the sky, you know how I feel. Reeds drifting on by, you know how I feel.... I am feelin good." It is so gosh-darn pretty out today... gee-golly-whiz!

Just landed. Sitting in the airport, in a little patch of window sun, waiting for Matthew to get off his plane. 6am this morning, we had a small botheration... something to do with misspelling Matt's name (oh lordy-me-geebers!) which led to him not being able to locate his confirmation number (eeek-rugby-shanglefest!) which is turn, led to the lady at the front desk refusing to issue his tickets (jimmy jam johnson-mankey!) - Had to make a few phone calls, but everything should be golden now... well, hopefully... I cannot help but worry that he did not miss his connecting flight.... he is Matthew, afterall....

Guess I should go pick up my rental car now, huh? Lets all cross our fingers that they ran out of crappy compact cars! When I get down to Avis, there shall be nothing but hot sexy convertibles by the dozen.... being evenly distributed for the same exact price as the compact! Happened once in AZ... it was equivalent to winning the lottery or something.

PS: V.... thank you SO much for the Banjo book! I already learned a bunch of new things that youtube could not teach me... it was really awesome of you to toss that in the mail for me. : ) Much love to you!

Roomates, Banjos, and thee Watchmen

My roommates left town for Florida, yesterday! I know it bad to say this, but I cannot help it - I feel liberated! Finally! I can prance around the house naked! I can play music as loud as I would like! I can stay up late without worrying about Clinicals or their jobs or their sleeping-patterns or their judgments - There are no guilt trips this week, no sir-ee! I can breathe this stale basement air without worrying if I will be scrutinized for it....!

....It is a little hard for me living here. I love Patrick (I love him so much)..... And our roommates are great roommates (they really are, they do all the stuff roommates should do).... It is just that I feel as if they do not like me very much. Not sure if it is my job? Or the fact that they run marathons and I type on my computer all day? Not sure what it is - All I know, is that I am pretty good at reading people (it is part of my job) and what I read off of them is that they wish that I was somewhere else...

Keep hoping that when Pat and I move to Austin in August, we will find some silly childish roommates that love life - and take nothing seriously... that would be brilliant. Icecream socials! Fingerpainting extravaganzas! Tea parties on someone's pavilion! Perhaps, I dream too big....

Hey hey! My new 5-string banjo came in the mail yesterday! Whooo! It is SO beautiful! This is the first time I have bought myself something in months.... Been adamantly watching Youtube tutorials all morning, trying to become a Master-Banjo-Player! - Got the Earl Scruggs roll down ....moved onto learning some simple chords that do not tear my fingers apart. My goal is to locate a Banjo-teaching guru out here in Cleveland... it would get me out of the house and perhaps I could meet some musical types... tutorials can only take you so far, you know?

Loaned Matthew my Sookie Stackhouse novel set that PD got me for Christmas.... Just got an email from his this morning, here is what he had to say:

"I am addicted to sookie stackhouse. I am on book 4. I cannot sleep. I cannot eat I can barely get myself to work because I want to see how my new friend is fairing in her fictional life. I had my roommate, Sarah, read the first one and she fucking made fun of it mercilessly for being so stupid but guess what shes on book two so that is that. Florida! I am just excited to be something different for awhile, in the sun. I love you! Florida is like two days away its fucking crazy I am so tired I cannot think I love you i love yOu I love you..........matthew"

And that is correct - Florida is in two more days.... Sarasota, Tampa, Orlando, New Smyrna, Miami, Key West.... all hail the sunshine state! Adventure is about to ensue.... : )

For my Birthday:

I bought myself a Banjo!

Yay! I am so excited!

Re-cap on The Cuse... !

Never had a chance to talk about all the fun stuff I did in Syracuse....lets recap!

My close friend, Jeff, from high school still resides in Syracuse... not in the bad way... not the I-could-not-get-out way - but more in the way that he has always just enjoyed the Syracuse life. Jeff is a super talented musician ... In his freetime, I have mentioned previously before that he books musical talent for this cute little coffee shop on Westcott Street called "2nd Story," Last time I was at 2nd Story, Matt and I were watching Emily Wells do-her-thang on her violin. That sexy female violin hip-hop artist!!... Heard she is playing SXS this year. That is a really big gig, congrats to her!

This time around at the 2nd Story, Jeff got a band called The Low Anthem to perform.... And even though the band had to make an insane jog Minneapolis the next day... They invited Matt, Jeff, and I to come hang out for the night. We were all up until 3am, in this crazy rollercoaster ride of a jam session - emotions are so strange - music is so beautiful when it can convey them... Oooh and I got to sing Blue Moon Over Kentucky! And Matt drank beer and played piano. Just when you think you know someone completely... and they drink a beer and play the piano... messes with your mind...

While in Syracuse.... Matt and I also went to go see Jeff's side-project play and we got to go shopping at my favorite 2nd-hand shop and we worked out at Planet Fitness. I finally went to the doctors (told you I would, it just took awhile). The doctors are fifty percent sure that I have cysts in my ovaries, which is pretty common.... they upped my hormone intake for three months and made me promise that I would come back for an Ultrasound in May.... which I will (eventually). I like visiting Syracuse...

Tomorrow is my Birthday... I turn 25. That makes me a little sad. Not so much because I am get "getting old," I realize that 25 is not old..... but because several years ago I made promises to myself about where I wanted to be when I was 25 and looking around, I am not there. Anyways, lets get away from that... what were you doing when you were 25? Did you get married? Did you fly out to Hawaii for your Honeymoon? Were you having kids or buying a house or picking out a puppy for your new niece? Did you start a career? Did you love your life when you were 25? Tell me a story....

Photos: Gary M Photo - Dayton Ohio

"But you will look great!"

Few days ago I came down with the Flu and had to cancel all my bookings for Pittsburgh. I was laid-flat, all fever-ish, confined to my bed all day.

Some of the photographers were happy about the 24 hour notice and gladly re-booked with me for early April... others... well... lets just say others were not 'shiny happy people holding hands'.

Matt wrote me an email... asking me how I was feeling. Explained to him that my temperature was skyrocketing and it was difficult to keep food down (yet, of course, more descriptive and gory-like.... because I was writhing in pain and hoping for a virtual sympathy hug)...... To which he replied,

"Wow.....that is basically terrible - but you will look great by the time we go to Florida, keep me posted I love you ........"

That would be Matt for you... my Virtual Love Muffin!

Took five days.... but I am almost back to feeling normal again. Temperature is back to where it should be, my body no longer feels like it needs an exorcism. I am now thriving on a diet that consists of nothing but oyster crackers and chicken-broth (I am too scared to eat anything else - nothing will stay in my body) - I have lost almost twelve pounds. So in a way, Matt did find the cloud's silver lining.... It is true, once I tone-up at the gym - I will look really good for Florida next week.

Photo Credit: EPO (thought these photos were appropriate... ) Feb 14, 2009