Tuesday, January 18, 2011

My Strap-On Box

While shopping for lingerie today - I found MY strap-on Box! Hehehe.... always makes me giggle...

I arrived at that shoot - to find eight dudes, sitting on the couch, drinking whiskey, watching hardcore porn.  Sex-toys everywhere! Sex toys tossed carelessly on sofas, the tables, the floor. I came to the obvious conclusion - Someone set me up for a bukkake scene?!..... I freaked out! Grabbed my stuff and high-tailed it to my car. Half way there, I ran into the photographer in the parking lot.  He seemed genuinely happy to see me. He seemed honest and likeable. I did not feel like he would try to put me in a bukkake scene....

Me:  "Ummm... What is going on with porno escapade inside?"

Him:  "Oh you mean all the guys on the couch?.... They are actually reviewing product today.  I think there are about eight of them, right?  Production managers, toy creators, box cover managers, ect...."

Me:  "You mean, those guys in there - get paid to watch porn?"

Him:  "Yup, they get paid for that."


The strap-on was so cheaply made, they used duct tape on my butt, to keep it attached..... My makeup artist kept coming over and adding more tape.... Man, duct tape is great for anything!


Sara Liz told Carlotta that I had a giant poster at the AVN's last year - Not sure whether that is flattering or.... well, yea... It's flattering..... Anyways - if you see my big black dong in a sex-shop - feel free to tell people you know me... haha.... that should spark some good conversation...

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Perry and Meeyah

Patrick and I adopted the three year old Catahoula dog!

Had a terrible mishap on the day we brought her home - Perry, our resident kitty, was hanging out around the house, not really interacting with the dog (we have had dogs over before without incident)... And then, without any kind warning, Perry attacked the dog all teeth and nails (Perry grew up in a Motel parking lot, where dogs chased her all the time - I guess I should have known Perry should have expected this).... Anyways, Perry gouged Meeyah's eye badly - I felt horrible about it. Within four hours of bringing Meeyah home, we were headed to the Emergency ER....The only positive thing I can take away from visiting the ER that night, is that Pat and I really had the chance to see Meeyah's amazing temperament..... She was in SO much pain (cat scratches are really dirty things) and she never growled or got upset with any of the vet tech poking her eyeball. She just quietly sat there, looking sad, hoping it would be over.

Meeyah is still recovering... luckily, her eye looks great. Thankful that everything worked out OK.... I cannot tell you how worried and upset I was about this. Perry still hates the dog. And our dog is now terribly terrified of all cats.... 

Positive things about the new addition to the family: Meeyah cuddles A LOT! She will snuggle up right next to you in bed, and cuddle her head right under your chin and anytime you stop hugging her, she will snuggle closer. It is adorable. She loves new people. She has not barked once since we have gotten her (I keep wondering if she even knows how to bark) She has already learned Sit/Stay/Down.

Negatives: She smells terrible! And I cannot wash her until her stitches come out.... She isn't housebroken (it was impossible to crate train her with that Elizabethan Collar, so we have just been watching her and taking her outside on a schedule.... works about 70 percent of the time) - She is hungry and wants to eat ALL food.... she doesn't discriminate between my salad bowl, my favorite book, or a dog bone - She won't play fetch with me.... but it's cool. I like playing fetch with myself, Meeyah. No worries.

Neon glasses and a bowler hat

Matt moved back to Syracuse. You should have seen him in the airport, carrying around four months of belongings - He had BurningMan clothes, dressy clothes for LA, workout stuff, regular clothing - It wouldn't all fit in his bag...... So he just wore it. He looked like he was headed to a themed party in Antarctica, where they wear neon sunglasses with bowler hats..... We were flying on Christmas Day (first for me) - We gave up our seats on the plane to a very desperate couple trying to get home to visit their family for Christmas. In return, the airline gave Matt and I $600 in vouchers and we still got home before midnight! It was a happy holiday to everyone.