February in Rochester

Grew up in Syracuse, NY.... Never have I seen a winter this mild, this soft spoken - The snow comes quietly at night, melts off early, before homemakers can pull back their curtains and catch a glimpse. If I wasn't staying up until 3am every night, I doubt I would even notice that it snowed at all - MomDog and I walk the SouthWedge late on those nights, dark windows, soft snowflakes.... Mornings are remnants of Texas, brilliantly sunny - Warm, vibrant - Sunlight teases your windows, begs you to start your day.... And yet, by the time you brush your teeth and pull on your coat, the clouds set in - The sky turns gray, heavy, overcast, dark, muddled, dreary - The days here are long and dark. I feel like I am living in the Pacific Northwest, but without the ocean or the hot springs or the many wintertime festivals...

For a girl who relies on the weather for happiness....
I don't thrive very well here.
A cactus, in Alaska....

Dog Grooming Certification is going well, though - Only five more weeks to go - I am currently studying for my written test for the Department of Education.....Breeds, first aid, CPR, emergency routines - Proper cuts, equipment, what you need to run your own business, insurance - Started looking for work last week.... I have an interview with a local dog boarding kennel this Wednesday.... I dunno. I'm nervous - Outside of modeling, I haven't applied for a job in almost seven years - I am completely clueless with how to approach my interview... obviously, I don't have much of a resume... And obviously, I cannot talk about my current job as a nude model.... Soooo I guess I just have to rely on the fact that I've been in certification school for eight months?....

My birthday is in two weeks.... Matt and I are going to celebrate by throwing a HUGE Moulin Rouge party - A buddy sent a killer projector, and we are going to project the movie and have a sing-a-long...... All the men have to have groomed moustaches and frilly french button down shirts - All the girls have to dress up like burlesque dancers... We are going to serve french food and champagne.... Ha. It will be silly, fun, and lighthearted.... I enjoy any reason to dress up and be around good company... Yay! Birthday!

As for modeling stuff - I am headed to Detroit this weekend.... Sita Mae got some of our photos published in the Dirty Show (one of the largest erotic art shows in the US)!..... I am stoked........ Still currently booking last minute shoots for Toledo and Detroit for Sunday only... so if you want to shoot - catch me while you can! :  )

New Work!

Kerouac

“There’s nothing to life but the living of it…hold still man, regain your love of life and go down from this mountain and simply be-be-be the infinite fertilities of the one mind of infinity. make no comments, complaints, criticisms, appraisials, avowals, sayings, shooting stars of thought, just flow, flow, be you all, be your what it is, it is only what it always is…so shut up, live, travel, adventure, bless and don’t be sorry.” - Jack Kerouac

"Collision with Animal"

That is what the insurance company calls it.... What they should call it is: Collision with a crazy giant 200lb suicidal kamikaze Buck - I don't know why, of all times he decided to cross the road, that ridiculous buck decided to cross the road INTO my car... *sigh* - Couldn't have stopped if I wanted to... he cut in at a 90 degree angle, galloping full speed right into the drivers side of my mustang. Happened so fast.... I could barely breathe. Huge antlers headed towards my window, it's eyes rolling into it's head, I heard it's neck snap as it impacted on my windshield.... Car shook and rattled.... Drove a half mile before the engine gurgled, turned over and died.... I glided to the right side of the road....

Highway Patrol showed up three minutes later - Two guys hopped out of their cruiser with flashlights, looking at the under belly of their car. "Did you see that fucking deer!!!? It was a monster!! Biggest one I've seen all season!! Can't believe we ran right over it!" Flashlights on door, flashlights in my face... Kept trying to tell them that I was OK - But couldn't roll my window down or open my door.... car was too smashed up....

Tow truck guy (who was insanely attractive beyond all comprehensible belief) - Towed me to Farmington, a small town about twenty miles from Rochester NY. Dropped off my car. Dropped me off at a hotel. By which time, it was about 4am.... I called Matthew and gushed about how terrible I felt about killing a majestic magical animal with seven points on each antler - Matthew gushed about how I should go pick the deer up and bring it home so we could eat it - "I've been a vegetarian for three years, but I would make an exception to save that animal from wasting away on the side of Highway 90".... Obviously, I didn't go back for the deer..... I imagine Matthew and I trying to cut up a big bloody animal in our backyard... I would cry, he would cry, we'd be covered in blood... It would be a mess... As my adrenaline rush finally left me at 5:30am, I crashed out on top of my covers...

USAA is awesome. They had my car towed to Rochester, to a nearby collision place for free. They set me up with a cute rental car from Enterprise (little Toyota Camery). Issued the check yesterday so my car will be worked on promptly. I have a $500 deductible. The collision place told me I probably won't have the mustang back until after Thanksgiving.... so it looks like I am driving my rental car to Boston for the holidays. Yep.

Han Noodle

... on Monroe, has really yummy vegetarian food!
Mmmm... and hot Jasmine tea..... yep....

October

For all the ups and downs in the past few months, things seem to slowly be turning around - Time still moves slowly here in Rochester. One week here, feels a lot like a month or two (or three or four). Looking at myself, I am not really doing much with my life (But really, who is? What are you doing?). I am in school, learning how to run my own business someday - Barely modeling (by choice), working locally, traveling once a month for modeling work (shame really, cause I haven't felt this good or looked this healthy in a very long time...) - I will most likely get a part-time grooming job in January once I am confident in myself and my abilities  - I want to start grooming more often, phase the modeling out slowly... Maybe a few more trips to LA and AZ, places that are warm and inviting this winter, but I feel detached from the modeling world..... I love photography... I love many of you who have photographed me in the past....but I haven't "felt" love for modeling in a very long time....

Rochester life is full of friends - Matthew, Kate, Kurt, John, Molly, Aaron, Sarah, Jeff, a mess of wonderful acquaintances who come and go throughout the week. Campfires with Apple Cider. Dinner parties till midnight. Hiking in pretty places. Coffee houses. Live music. Dancing. Movie nights. Lux. Art galleries. First Friday. Matt and I paint now and then - Lots of great companionship, lots of wonderful memories being made every day. Haven't .... had a community of friends like this... ever.... it is really new and very welcome.

Eric Jackson - Cleveland Photos

Worked with a few people in Pittsburgh and Cleveland this weekend! Thought I would share some photos... :  ) Happy-end-of-Fall to all of you!