Showertimes

When the weather gets chilly..... I do not turn up the heat in my apartment, no - Instead, I emerse myself in a blistering hot shower! My bathroom becomes an incredible searing hot vortex, in which normal people would either scald to death or melt into a giant puddle of broiled mush bubbling in the drainpipes.... In my sweltering sweat room, I create an ongoing fantasy: I am in a wooden steam bath deep in the Amazon, sharing my company with intellectual guru-types. It is exotic, there are birds in the rainforest, and mist in the trees. Back home in Austin.... my Amazon gurus hang out on my porcelian crapper, making bowel movements, while picking kitten hair off their toes.... I suppose..... every steam bath, in every house, is different.

Best ideas for blogs come to me while showering. Then, of course, by the time I sit down in front of my computer, I have forgotten all the things that were worthwhile - except for this morning! This morning, while I was showering, I recalled a conversation from years ago.... It was this crazy sex story about my friend in LA, and how her and her man had been getting down and dirty in the shower - Somehow, amidst the friction, she slipped and nose-skidded into her bathtub faucet - breaking her both nose, a few teeth, and busting open her lip. Not the best shower story, I know. Perhaps it was the horror of the story, but today I remembered once I sat in front of my computer, and actually decided to Google how many sex related accidents happen in the bathroom (I often spend a lot of time Googling things like this) - And holy hell, I know this has nothing to do with sex in the bathtub, but did you know that you can get electrocuted while taking a shower in a thunderstorm? It is serious! Who knew? Somewhere between 10-30 people get electrocuted every year in their bathtub: Through their metal pipes, through impurities in the water, through bathtub attachments.... They say that the majority of people who survive these freak-accidents are the people who were wearing rubber shoes.....

Who wears rubber shoes in the shower? I don't know - I might just put it on my Christmas List.... You can never be too safe, you know.

Disintegration Collaboration

"Hi, London! It's been a long time since I've written. I congratulate you on your kitty-loving ways and your decision to go veggie. I've been a vegetarian for a couple of years now and, slowly, I'm aiming at a vegan path. I know you're super busy so I wanted to let you know that some of my latest artwork is part of the Disintegration Collaboration Project, which allows time and nature to help you create recycled art. One of my latest DisCo bundles features a xerox low res picture of you. After several weeks of rain, wind, heat, etc., here are the results. 

Take care, London. I wish you the best - Duff"

Photos from Chicago!

Joplin, Kansas City, Omaha, Milwaukee

As my new buddy, Doug in Joplin MO, would say, "It isn't a London Andrew's trip unless it is last minute and unorganized...." - Alas, that statement is very true.... The Midwest did not pan out for me as well as I hoped.... I found very little work between Dallas and Milwaukee - Not sure if this is because I booked it last minute (within two weeks notice), if the economy is bad, if it is the Midwest, or if it is just me.... I don't know.... either way, the drive has been incredibly beautiful .... and... As usual, I am incredibly broke...

Joplin was fun! Had the chance to hang with some new friends and we watched 4am Pumpkin Carving on TV. Kansas City was cold but the coffee shops were warm!  Our couchsurfer was an energy healer..... In Omaha, I had the chance to shoot in one of the most gorgeous historical Bed and Breakfast places I have ever visited... Andrew Baran was his talented amazing self, we shot some fantastic new stuff together.... He also shot a bunch of photos of Matthew (I included most of the photos in this blog).... Cannot wait to see what else we created! Matt and I went to check out LCD Soundsystem and HotChip on Friday night - The show was phenonminal...

Gearing up for Roadtrip...

Lots has been happening - Matt, my best friend, flew to Austin after Burning Man and has been living with Patrick and I for a little over a month... He is sleeping on our couch, living out of his suitcase (reminds me of our roadtrip years ago)

Austin City Limits was this past weekend - Spent the entire weekend, dancing, laughing, saturated in fantastic music.... The Local Natives were amazing live and Mayer Hawthorne put on a great set as well. ACL festival was very healing for the soul.... but it was not very healing for the body - Our entire house has been recooperating from cold/flu/strep throat for the past week..... On the upside, I won the PopChips challenge on Facebook this week! Thanks to all who voted, I know it is a pain-in-the-butt voting for people - But you helped me win a Platinum badge to SXSW Festival ($995 value) - I will be able to attend conferences for: publishing events, blogging events, social media events - Most importantly, I will be allowed to cut any line at SXSW..... And that, my friends, is well worth all that clicking you had to do on Facebook... :  )

As I type this, Matthew and I are gearing up for a whirlwind modeling tour to Chicago - My mustang is still broken down in our parking lot, so I am going to be driving Pat's Outback - The trip should take 10 days to get to Chicago and 10 days to get back to Austin - I feel so rusty.... I haven't booked a real modeling trip in almost four months now.... If I had started booking four weeks ago, I would have made $4000, now I will be lucky if I make $2000, everyone has already booked their models for the month....

This week, I was inspired to paint a mural on my wall... Pulled up one of my favorite artists, Amy Sol (painting to the left is the original print) and decided to get kinda funky and colorful with the Windy Panda Bear painting.... Lots of bright oranges, deep reds, and browns.... Years ago, I used to paint murals as a part-time job - And I have to say, that after five years of not picking up a paint brush, I was amazed that I can still create something this beautiful... I love how it inspires me and clears my head - I have not felt this great about creating something in years....

ModelMayhemWTF

Any of you follow ModelMayhemWTF on Twitter - They are pretty fantastic... A few weeks ago, while searching for paid work in Baton Rouge, I posted a photo to MMWTF: A naked model holding a dead catfish - Everything about the photo was "Ummm? What? Fuck?" - Well, coincidently, I had also emailed the guy, asking if he had any paid work for a traveling model - He said, "Yes! I have tons of ideas! I will hire you for four hours...! Come on over!"

And he did have tons of ideas - He had bought a bunch of pumpkins and he wanted me to stab them with knives - "Oooh this would be great if we had some fake blood" - He grabs red food coloring and starts dropping blood droplets all over the pumpkin and my boobs... About 10 minutes in, I notice that the food coloring is not coming off my hands... I ask him, "Did you check if this stuff washes off first?" And he goes, "Oh no, I forgot - I was just so-into-the-moment and you needed fake blood...." - I run to the shower.... It does not come off - Stuck with a weird pink blotches everywhere.. "Do you want to keep shooting?" "Of course! You look fine! Pink looks fine" Next he decides to shoot "Attack of the killer blob!" He pulls out a five pound bag of white powdery substance... "What is that stuff?" And he goes, "Oh, I work at the chemical plant!... I took it from work." And I go, "Yea, but what IS it?" And he goes, "I am not sure - We use it in a lot of things, like paint and household substances..." "But is it safe?" He goes, "I think it is..." At this point - I figure - I must have no-showed on this guy years ago... and now he is going to punish me with blotchy skin and cancerous materials.... But I shoot it....  and I shoot it fast... Showering afterwards, through the glass doors, I noticed the photographer now wearing nothing but a pair of tiny orange shorts...! Alarms sound off in my head! What is going on? He announces, "We are going to swimming! I have a few bottles of liquid nitrogen I took from work..." And I say, "Isn't that the stuff that dermatologists use on wart removal?!" And he goes, "Yup! Same stuff!"  Wow... what did I do this guy?.... Pink tinged, covered in cancerous slime, and now he is going to burn my skin off? Wow....

But actually, the liquid nitrogen was pretty neat - I have done a lot of photoshooting over the years and no one has shot anything like that with me before.... The liquid nitrogen freezes a very thin layer water... The water vapor then condenses making the most beautiful foggy smoke stuff...! Everything was great until he said that he wanted to Reanact a movie "FaceOff"... and he threw all the liquid nitrogen on my face....  and my face melted into the pool....

Everything was great until that happened.... (just joking... )

Seriously, though.... although it was a lot of fun, I learned a valuable lesson... Which is, almost all the models out there (including myself) put far too much trust into phototgraphers.... We expect the photographers to consider our safety and avoid dangerous situations - We expect them to plan their shoots, to scout, to experiment, to practice before we show up to shoot, to know what they are doing...  And sometimes they... just... do... not.... This is just a quick note to all you guys: Please try to consider your model's safety.... :  )  It is important and my mom would appreciate it a bunch!  Thanks!

Finding an apartment...

Months ago, the roommates and I talked about moving together - But last week, John and Bryn came home to tell us that they found a place and were moving without us.... It was that roommate break-up conversation, "It is not you, it is us."  Blah blah blah...

Congrats to them - but it truly left Pat and I in a bind. Only two weeks notice - no extensions on the lease.... Pat and I first considered getting a one bedroom home. We looked at a few places, but they were either too expensive or the move-in date was not until mid-September. We considered looking for roommates again.... but with the deadline being so close and all ... we decided against it..... Sooooo we started looking into apartment complexes...

....... Dreaded mass-produced apartment complexes *puke*.....

But not even kidding, there are some really nice ones in South Austin, right next to the Zilker Park/GreenBelt trailhead. The apartment complex we moved into is called The Woods - Obvious reason for the name? Apartments were built around the trees, we live inside a forest... The Woods was built in 1940's and was recently renovated... There is a pool, fitness center. Pat and I found this great 1 bedroom, 680 sq ft, with loft ceilings and a balcony.  It has brand new carpet, washer and dryer, a dishwasher, a pantry, a walkin closet (for all my sexy clothes....!), even an ice-cube maker!  I am having fun putting the place together.... It is nice being able to buy things, knowing that I can put them where ever I want. Bought some meat ikea bookshelves off craigslist for $40 - Something about owning two, seven foot bookshelves, makes me feel like I finally own something worthwhile.

I *do* feel guilty about Perry, though - I don't want to let her outside until she gets used to the new place.... She is usually so active, and now she is just bored.  She follows me around the house, like a game of follow-the-leader. She sleeps on the fridge. She sleeps in the pantry. She sleeps in the laundry.... She misses the cockroaches.