Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Beware of Butt Carrot!

Regarding the previous post - Chris's comment should not be hidden behind a response button... ha... I am giving him his own blog entry....

"That guy is right. So very right. For realism you totally need a carrot in your butt. It's common knowledge that real cannibals prepare their meals by putting a carrot in the person's butt. Humans are totally inedible otherwise. Everyone knows that. Well, not everyone. But real cannibals know that, as well as most farmers and all elected city officials (read the fine print should you ever decide to run for office).

Best way to spot a fake or "poseur" cannibal is if they've got a person they're going to eat and that person doesn't have a carrot in their butt. If you are ever in a situation where you think someone is about to eat you, and they haven't put a carrot in your butt, rest easy! It will not happen! To eat you without having put a carrot in your butt would be pure folly!

(If they have put a carrot in your butt then beware! They intend to eat you so run away fast! As fast as you can run with a carrot in your butt.)

I've seen a lot of cannibalism pictures in my day and anytime there's not a carrot in the butt I'm like OMG TOTALLY FAKE. NICE TRY FAKE CANNIBAL PHOTOGRAPHY PERSON. NICE TRY INDEED.

In closing: I'm pretty sure this guy just wants to put a carrot in your butt. I would either go shopping for carrots (ask your grocer for the appropriate brand of butt-friendly carrots!) or perhaps block this dude's e-mail for eternity."

(Note: While looking for photos - I was AMAZED just how many girls DO stick carrots in their butts! Did you ever google 'carrot porn'? Probably not... who would ever think to do that.... Worse than carrots, a girl shoving a full grown squash in her rectum popped up on my screen.... whoa!)

7 comments:

Bad Guy Zero said...

Those crazy insertion photos/videos are truly like a gruesome car wreck: you want to look a way but you can't. I've often wondered what compels someone to look at a fruit or vegetable or bottle of water and think "I bet I could stick that up my ass/pussy." I'm surprised there isn't some crazy Wiffle Ball league where women step up to the plate and swing at the ball with the bat they have shoved in their ass. Or perhaps there is and I've luckily avoided that website.

Anonymous said...

The fact that you just came up with that idea means that there will be a website focused on it tomorrow. It's Rule 34, whatever idea someone has, there's porn about it.

Mr & Mrs Muki said...

Clearly, we have no idea of what we are doing... In 10 years of shooting cute cannibal-themed photos (well over 100 sets now), we've only stuck a carrot in a model's butt once -- and we didn't even eat her! (Actually, the model did it herself, as we would never presume that we could be so familiar...)

London, you seem very professional and you certainly do look delicious! If you're curious about posing, you can always ask one of the models you know who has worked with us.

And we promise not to stick a carrot in your butt!

--Mr & Mrs Muki

London Andrews said...

HAHAHA.... Mr and Mrs Muki! I love you guys! I am so happy you made it over to my blog.... !

Where are you two located? I would definitely pose for you sometime! I really like your cauldron set-up where you boil people.... Looks like a hot-tub.... do you keep the water warm... !?

Hope you can look at this post and laugh - I just love the fact that we are talking about butt carrots... haha..

Kitty Morris said...

oh my gosh this made me laugh so much! 'for realism', possibly the best thing I've read all week :D

Derek Bateman said...

That plush carrot wouldn't be so smiley if it knew where it was going.

Shakespearian said...

LMAO....Wow, not are you only a very beautiful lady, but you have one heck of a great sense of humour. I laughed my socks off.

I must say that you appear quite intelligent also, I was only aware of the asparagus up each nostril, but not the carrot up the butt....that explaines why my Grandfather used to walk funny after visiting a cannibal tribe during his days of missionary work....thank you for the heads up!

Love Luke x