Type. Pause. Type. Pause.

After the 2007 roadtrip, Matthew got a job selling decorative ribbons to people at an upscale store Union Square. Called Matthew at work today and an angry sounding woman picked up, "Matthew no longer works here." WTF? I stopped by his apartment yesterday. No one answered - he does not have a cell phone or a computer. I am worried.... Matt gets really upset when he does not fit into the whole society/working culture thing. He just wants to read books on the universe, meditate, and pretend he is a Yogi master. 

I never got to thank everyone who bought me birthday presents! I got the new seat covers, new Bettie Page mascot stickers and a book about Route 66 (which will come in handy, I am all over the old route 66 in two weeks!) Thanks for helping make the trip more colorful! 

Was a thread on MM tonight....

Thread - " Models, have you ever done a nude shoot which a photographer who was obviously and visibly very sexually turned on by the work you two were creating? How do you handle this? If you were in the position would you finish the shoot or leave right away?"

While I never think that sexual behavior is appropriate at a shoot, this question reminded me of a photoshoot from a few months ago.

I was shooting with a photographer that was wearing these super tight, white-washed 80's jeans that clung to him like a second skin. We were shooting artsy stuff in a window and he gets this HUGE (I am talking monstrous) erection down the front of his pants. There was barely any room in his pants to start with. I did not know what to do? He was not trying to hit on me and he was not acting sexual. He was, actually, acting like he did not even know it was there. So I just tried my best to ALSO ignore the giant python looking-thing poking down his thigh. Eventually, though, this large wet pre-cum stain started soaking through his pants and I just could not take it anymore. I was like, "This is super weird! I don't know if I should excuse myself or if YOU should excuse yourself?" Eventually I returned to the shoot, the thing in his pants went down and we finished taking photos... but I thought it was just hilarious. Not that he had an erection, but that he had an erection in white washed jeans with a pre-cum stain.

Family Life

You know, coming Home for me is always a little bit hard. I remember when "Home" was a place that I needed in my life..... When I first started modeling, I would jump on a plane and come "Home" every chance I got. A physical place to ground myself. A life with so little familiarity, I need a constant in both modeling and reality to make sense of my life. It has been a disappointing realization that "Home"..... right now sucks ass. The tension is atomic; atmosphere poison - half of us do not even converse any longer. I feel like I partake in a family, that if put on Jerry Springer, would either walk off stage or beat eachother's faces in....

... sometimes I feel like violence might be the best answer to this.....

For now, I will continue to do the same thing I always do when I come "home" - which is simply concentrate on leaving again, psyche myself up for it. Hope that when I return in August, everyone will get along, perhaps a bit....

Yes, some families have it much worse - but that is not a comfort to me ...

Just want to get to NYC, and when I get there, I am sure I will just want to get to Houston and once in Houston, I am sure I will just want to get to California... I cannot sit still. Just gypsy-in around the world, that is all I know how to do right now.

Home home home....

Tons of stuff to chat about but right now, I just want to sleep... SO - Spark Notes on my Life:

• Just arrived back home after a six hour flight out of Houston, TX.
• Cab drivers who listen to 9/11 police recording tapes are scary
• "Pinch a Loaf" is a disgusting term
• FiveNakedModels went live today on YouTube
• I have W4's.... fucking hell.... I have to do taxes
• How do you think I would look with blond hair?
• Jetblue has Satellite TV and Dunkin Donuts on their planes
• Oooh, I get to visit my grandparents this week!

Home Sweet Home - (well, for the moment..... right?)

Gumbo, Kitties, and Ben-Gays...?

I was not planning on returning to Louisiana unless it was mardi gras season or something. .....But SunArcher Photography wooed me with tales of Gumbo. I left Hot Springs and detoured to Shreveport. 

Tim's house was a nice stop-off. We shot all day - which is always a hard thing for me. After about three hours, I start drifting off..... But we changed locations six times, which helped a lot. It is always nice to shoot with someone who is still completely excited over photography - I mean, like little kid, almost jumping up and down excited..... I love that. It keeps you going and puts you in a good mood.

Now I am in Dallas staying with Randy and Mr. Kitty....Last time I was here, Matthew was with me. I remember when he crawled into bed the first night - he said, "Your life is just insane. I cannot believe you just sleep in a different house every night....." Ha, and that just made me giggle.... I love this place. Randy is great company, he is a dancing man, we watch American Idol together, he lets me sleep in until 11am.... let me tell you, if you can sleep-in at someone's house until 11am and still feel welcome - that place is a good place to be.

Happy Working Song.... and Oaklawn Race Track

I left Little Rock hoping to go soak in some of the Bath-houses at Hot Springs (I LOVE hot springs... I have them bookmarked for every state I visit)..... The roads are a little strange in Hot Springs, AR - they kind of weave in and out, around in a circles. Neat town though, Route 66 is still alive and doing well. Somehow, weaving in and around the roads, I managed to locate the Arlington Hotel (Al Capone's favorite hotel) which had a neat spa... I passed up the hotel, though, to go check out the racetrack (actual photo of OakLawn Racing Track below). Again, I got kind of disoriented with all the roads and turn offs for the track.... so I ended up pulling into the stables. Maybe it was the out-of-state plates or something, but they definitely made a mistake and just waved my car in. I got to watch the race from the point-of-view that the photo was taken. Eventually some jockies came over, trying to figure out what I was doing, we struck up conversation .... I never knew how tiny jockies are. They are so itty bitty and so talented. I have never learned so much in a single day - I learned how to pivot a race horse, how to gamble... they explained the track, the different kind of races, what the score boards were about. It was the most entertaining mistake I have made in months..... Eventually as the guys were getting ready for the 10th race or something, I made my way to the actual track.... I made a bunch of new friends, and this cute little Grandma and I bet on a horse together.... I filmed a little part of the race. Perhaps I will put it in my blog this Friday.....

Dumpster Diving

Couchsurfing a Memphis commune tonight = another world. Dumpster Diving for bagels. Their dog vomited on the couch that I was sleeping on and they just tossed a sleeping bag over and said, "Get some sleep"..... I know that everyone that follows this blog thinks that I am some sort of hippie (and perhaps I am a little bit) - But I love a hot shower and some clean white sheets at night.