Wednesday, February 11, 2009

I did not work on your photos because...

Traveling through the midwest last year, I worked with a photographer somewhere off the map. Had a huge studio with a make-up artist, a hairstylist - In addition to payment, he also agreed to send me a couple photos from the shoot.... Since his fulltime job is shooting huge commerical gigs and billboards, that last part was very exciting for me.

Six months go by - Randomly think about him - drop him an email - no photos. A year goes by, I drop him another email - no photos. No biggie. Sucks but it happens... Yesterday, out of the middle of nowhere.... I received this email (note: it is a little disgusting)

"Dear London,
The reason it took me so long to retouch one of your photos is because you are so f***ing HOT! Every time I just looked at the photos (please don't be too disgusted) you made me come in my pants, within seconds (no touching, just London, schwing, spurt)!! You are the only girl that has caused that to happen to me since I was 14 years old! I just had to spend some time away from the wife and kids with a big box of kleenex and get the job done. : ) Please don't think this is some weird come on, it's just weird, but it's not a come on. : ) I actually would love to work with you again, if we do I'll wear depends and try not to make too much noise. Seriously I hope you are not too grossed out by all this, I would LOVE to photograph you again, I would never make a pass at you or anything, but I probably would be sporting wood, and be horribly embarrassed, and have to kill myself.

I hope you are able to forgive me, to laugh at this, and maybe even be just a little flattered?"

Now that is an honest answer (although it is also something I would prefer he kept to himself)....

Photos: Not taken by the photographer mentioned above. Local Photographer here in Cleveland Ohio - Jan 2009.

20 comments:

PD said...

....Just when you thought you heard it all. But you gotta admire the honesty.

Anonymous said...

I'm scared to ask what his excuse is when he files his taxes late... :-P

Anonymous said...

His name wouldn't happen to be Woody Johnson, right? Well, give the guy points for some major cojones at least. 8^D

doctor e said...

Wow. And I thought MY brain --> mouth/keyboard filter was bad!

We can discuss it further when you get to Florida next month.

E.

PS - Thanks for changing it to "midwest" instead of "Florida".... Much appreciated. ;)

Anonymous said...

That's pretty creepy. The lack of professionalism on his part and the overly graphic description of his inability to control himself is nothing short of troubling and perverse.

I love your work, London. Thanks for the site!

Anonymous said...

That's pretty creepy. The lack of professionalism on his part and the overly graphic description of his inability to control himself is nothing short of troubling and perverse.

I love your work, London. Thanks for the site!

Rebecca Lawrence said...

AHAHHAHAAAHAA
So would you shoot with him again? :p

Anonymous said...

"You are the only girl that has caused that to happen to me since I was 14 years old!"

Oh man, I'm sure his wife will be just tickled by that comment. Don't shoot again with this pig London. The fact that he just assumes you should be flattered and is even anticipating that you'll go back shows you what a crackpot he is -- I mean we're talking a whole year he's made you wait. I'm sure you find it amusing but there's an unwritten rule regarding photographers and their subjects that he has crossed in a rather vulgar way, he's obviously not mature enough to do what he does. That's just my opinion, of course, but you have the final say.

London Andrews said...

"I'm scared to ask what his excuse is when he files his taxes late..."

Ha.

And yes. I would shoot with him again. Although the email that he sent was super sexual and pervy-sounding.... As a photographer, he has always been incredibly professional on set... I have never had any problems with him... He kept his thoughts and his hands to himself at all times. I never felt threatened while shooting with him....

It is not the erotic email writers that get me - it is the guys who cannot keep their hands to themselves while shooting.... those guys.... they are the ones that I do not work with again.

Anonymous said...

Jessica,

Great blog! It would be nice to see you before you head back to Cleveland. I know a great breakfast place near the campus.

Call on cell,

Ed

Jim in Huntsville said...

This strikes me as a come-on: he's hoping you will do in person what you do in his fantasies, but couldn't ask you in person. He's probably safe to shoot with. But he will be disappointed when you don't pick up on the 'hint'.

(Now, where did I put those kleenex?)

Zoe Wiseman said...

I think this is the most gross email to a model I've ever seen. really makes me want to throw up. i'm sorry, but if you work with him again you are only encouraging him to talk this way to other models. i'm really trying to pick my jaw up off of the floor! ick. sorry for the unfiltered advice from me, but i can't help it... i'm thoroughly disgusted by this email. OMG!

London Andrews said...

Ed - it was nice to meet you last night at the hotel.... after you left.... A Bunny Rabbit, a Fairy, and Robin (from Batman and Robin) sat down next to me at the bar. And we started talking to those crazy people about nascar... and it was incredibly surreal.... Biker's Halloween party, a truckers field trip from michigan to go to Columbus strip clubs, some crazy nascar lady that kept drinking virgin mary's but kept acting like was trashed... it was a blast.... truly....

But as for lunch/dinner.... I am already back in Cleveland.... Hope work went well today for you.

Haha... and Zoe, take it from me, that particular email is not the grossest of the bunch... haha... The worst was from last year, where a guy wrote me to tell me that during the entire shoot - he wanted to bend down and fist my asshole.... ??????????? Now that email, which I will never post on here... was very detailed and graphic - it was disgusting.....

The photographer previously mentioned shoots for a living - is very happily married to a gorgeous lady who helps him on set - and he has a whole gaggle of children in soccer and football.... He is a good guy... I know I should not defend him, but he really just seems like someone's dirty uncle to me...

But you are right... rewarding bad behavior is bad news. I will skip shooting with him next time.... save myself a stupid situation where I watch him run around his studio in Depends... : )

PD said...

Been thinking about it, & its been bothering me. Yeah, he was honest, but everyone else is right: Creepy. Good move. Why deal with any aggrivation when you dont have to.

Anonymous said...

Rats! I missed a costume party...should have stayed longer. Bunny Rabbit? Fairy? Robin? how funny! Saturday went very well, thank you, but we still are about half a day behind where we should be. We'll hit it hard on Monday. I like the way you are handling the e-mail that's getting so much attention. Ed

Anonymous said...

Files his taxes Hehheh...Depends! Hahah. All I need to do now is watch a few episodes of the Big Bang Theory to make this the funniest day of the year for me so far ;-)

On the real London...Zoe hit the nail on the head, be safe x

The Kudos Man :-)

AZZO45 said...

Gee, now I know why you don't make your EM "public".

If Mr. Spanky-Depends is trusted with it (because he actually worked with you) I can only imagine the gems you would receive from the anonymous public.

Speaking of hiring you... Do I have to join MM or some other model site to get your contact info? You are stunning, & a possible reason for me to miss your main contact info??? Please assist me? THX.

London Andrews said...

About my contact info - I do not make it public. Sorry about that.... I do that for several reasons, but most importantly, it is just not very safe for me to be booking off the internet without references or a portfolio to look through...

Join MM or ModelInsider and drop me a line on there... : ) Would love to work with you sometime!

Wednesday Harrington said...

hon, you are in the fabulous position to pick and choose your shoots~! Why waste a moment with a photographer that you know is going to spend a year wanking over your pics before they get to you (and by that time, they are outdated anyway?)

he could just as easily kept those comments to himself and just apologized for his gross unprofessionalism and given you the pics. If you tolerate his untoward emails he may be less professional next time on the set.

Mark Reep said...

Seems almost off-topic, considering-
Just wanted to say though that the stairs shots are great. All the best!